The Selfish Side of Forgiveness

We all know that the first step toward health and growth in our churches is spiritual health.  There is no strategy or process that is going to overcome hardness of heart toward God or our fellow believers.

How often is the real spiritual work of God hindered because we are unwilling to forgive?  Has there been unkindness or worse done toward us, and we are unwilling to forgive?

Would you consider forgiveness?

The Call for Forgiveness

We all know that forgiveness is called for by the Lord.  In the Sermon on the Mount, as Jesus was giving foundational instructions for those who would follow Him, we are told to forgive.  We pray, “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.”  Then Jesus says, “If you forgive men when they sin against you, your Heavenly Father will forgive you.  But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”

The Reason for Forgiveness

Even when we know that we are called to forgive, we often struggle to make sense of it.  Making sense of forgiveness requires the realization that deserved forgiveness is just another name for justice.  If forgiveness is earned, it cannot be given.  You pay what is owed, you can only give what is not earned.  You pay a salary, you give a gift.

Making sense of forgiveness also requires us to remember how much we have been forgiven.  In Matthew 18 Jesus speaks in a parable to teach us how we are to deal with those who are indebted to us.  “Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had mercy on you?”  “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.” Matt 18:35

The Selfish Side of Forgiveness

We can understand that we are called to forgive.  And we can know that we have every reason to forgive after all that God has done to forgive us.  But for many people forgiveness is still slow in coming.

Forgiveness is not only called for by God, and a reasonable response.  Forgiveness is also good for us.  Hebrews 12:15 says, “See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.”  Failure to forgive infects the one who harbors the un-forgiveness.  Un-forgiveness becomes bitterness, and bitterness eats away at the life and joy of the believer.

I recently talked with a man who owns his own business.  He told me of a person who brought their car in for repairs, asked him to do the repair, and then never bothered to come back to pick up their car.  They decided to go out and buy another car, rather than pay the repair bill.  In the end, the business owner loses money.  This was not the first time this had occurred.

The interesting part of this was that the business owner said, “I just do what I need to do to handle the matter, and then I forget about it.”

Whether we are in need of personal spiritual renewal, or corporate church health, the giving of forgiveness may be the place we must begin.