David and Relationships

Leadership: Larry Thomas
Monday, March 28, 2005

Spiritual leaders who are fairly intact in their self-esteem can build community. They breed health in their relationships because they themselves possess psychological health. The opposite is also true; dysfunction breeds dysfunction.

First, David did not fit the leader-as-loner model. He craved community. God used the community around him to shape his heart. The foundation of David's community grew out of his security in himself, for God had anointed him. He took this as a sign of favor and blessing. The appointment by God framed David's self-perception. David did not seek affirmation through education or endorsement by other men. Even when David blew it, he fell toward God. Whenever he sinned, he repented, learned, and moved on. In other words, "he picked up his halo, dusted it off, put it back in place, and stepped out smartly." He did not let his tragic mistakes define him in a negative way.

Second, David's security in himself did not lead him into believing more about himself than he should. He did not ever fully believe his press. He knew where his real source of strength resided for his confidence grew out of his own relationship with his King.

Third, David's security in his relationship with God allowed him to entertain others' notions and ideas without feeling in competition with them. He had the benefit of wise counsel because of the community he enjoyed. He did not always have to be right, and he was willing to trust others' judgments. David avoided a haughty heart because he did not insulate himself against the community he served, through his leadership a great kingdom was forged because he captured the people's own dreams and served them.

Fourth, David created a great legacy in part because he lived an open life that allowed others to find their own destinies in his. He developed a heart after God's because he had a heart that had room for others.

Four Key Points About Relationships and David's Leadership

  1. He did not fit the leader-as-loner model.
  2. He did not think more of himself than he ought.
  3. His relationship with God allowed him to accept other leaders.
  4. He gladly acknowledged the contribution of others to his legacy.

Remember, to be more in love with Jesus today than when we first met him, he must be Lord in our lives, not just Lord when we desire. Finish well.